I am on someone else's computer right now. On the bright side, I checked the tracking page of my order, and my power cord made it into town today! Which was very speedy of FedEx, considering it was down by Tennessee when I last checked the location at 10:00 AM this morning.

Tomorrow is the work dinner at Olive's, and also cramming time for my math exam. So far everything is going swimmingly except for what happened to my final in SO 251. Hopefully that will be taken care of when I march up to his office tomorrow.

Oh my god, I am so excited for break! AHHHHH! Soooo close!

And now I will go to bed (but knowing me, it will probably be at least a half an hour from now before I do that) because I want to stop by Meijer to grab a few things before going to work.

I couldn't help it, I just had to quote The Joker/The Dark Knight. Seriously, that was the best movie I've seen this year, and I've seen a LOT of movies this year.

But yeah...today will be a long day.

I broke my power cord last night, so now I will be laptop-less for the next three days (if the site wasn't lying about how long shipping will take...not to mention it's winter, now). Thank GOD I only have exams this week, so I won't be needing it for anything.

However, I still have my research paper to do that is due tomorrow, and my work computer will be the only access I have to the Internet, and...well, my only access to a computer!

Man, I forgot how good it feels to write out everything I'm thinking! I feel more COMPLETE!

Hmm, I've been using a lot of exclamation points lately. I don't think it's proportionate to my enery or happiness level, though, haha.

I actually started a book last night. It was a monumental moment, and I find it sad that it only happened because I no longer had a computer with Internet (coughFacebookcough) to waste my time on. I used to love reading...where did those days go?

Here I am, back on Livejournal. I've decided to post here instead of my Xanga, because there are too many people I know there.

I am still procrastinating.

CO 146 - Finish off final chapter.
COM 135 - Research paper and final on Tuesday.
MA 127 - Final on Thursday.

And then I'll be freeeee! I'll be able to enjoy myself like the rest of my friends are doing!

Sometimes I want to go back to the younger days. I want to physically feel the relief from having no obligations whatsoever. Currently I always have something to worry about. I just want to live a day where I don't have to worry about anything, and just relax, with no weights on my mind.

Bah, but even when break comes on Thursday, I will still have things to worry about. I need to figure out what to get for my dad. I need to prepare myself for my dentist's appointment on the 30th. I need to budget my money so I can pay the $600 for the next three months for my tuition and also the dentist bill. Once summer comes, the whole process will start over again, because I'm taking summer classes.

Hopefully we really will go to Hong Kong this year, because it would be super nice to get away.

Oh man Oh man Oh man!

By 8:00 PM tonight, I will be witnessing the greatness that is THE NATIONAL.

And I'm one of the drivers to the show, which is in Pontiac...this is a great thrill for me, because as you all know, I adore driving. The idea of driving isn't JUST driving to me. It's like a game, but not really. It's so much fun. I'm not a exactly a speed demon either, but I definitely am not a turtle.

My rule of thumb is that I never speed during nighttime, though. It's too hard to see the cops, so obviously I'd rather not take the chance.

I feel like watching a movie (specifically Fight Club and Children of Men) right now...but I still need to fill my tank and write down the directions and get Jimmy John's before we leave at 4:00.

Gaaah! So excited! I might possibly faint from happiness when they play "Slow Show"!

Looking back at the entries I made in here from 2+ years ago leaves me in awe at how much someone can change in a few years. Amazing. I sound incredibly immature. Makes me wonder if I will like my current self when I come back here in another two years.

It has been snowing the WHOLE day today. It's pretty incredible to look at at, although the temperature is almost unbearable. But I'm not going to complain any more about it, because I'm just glad I don't live in Canada, lol.

I recently discovered something new about myself:

I. LOVE. FOOD.

I mean, who doesn't?? I was trying to explain to a friend of mine the surge of excitement I feel right before I eat. The anticipation for delicious food is oh-so-wonder. I love it. It's like, "Hmm, what should I eat now?"

Oddly enough, I've shed a few pounds in the past month. I went from 110 to 105. Maaajor question and bewildered look at that. I would like to believe my body is getting prepared for a growth spurt, but it's a very improbable occurrence. I have long ago accepted the fact that I'll remain 5 ft for the rest of my life. >.<

That is, until I hit 70 (if I even MAKE it to 70), then I will shrink a few inches and can officially be registered as a legal midget.

I can't believe myself.

ONCE AGAIN...I have procrastinated to the point where I'm going to have to stay up until at least 3:00 AM on a Sunday night to finish a fucking school project. This is...what, the fifth time I've done this? I hate this. I hate myself. Why do I keep doing this?? I even started it about two days early, yet I STILL end up in this pathetic state.

I'm relying on caffeine and good music to keep me up. Ugh, my god. I can only imagine what college will be like. I'll most likely be frantically trying to fit in multiple 50-page papers into one night.

Maybe I should learn to like coffee?

I cannot believe I'm actually up at this insanely early hour of the morning. Geesh. But I suppose in a way I'm proud of myself, with all the "going to bed before 10 and waking up at 10 in the morning" that's been going on lately. It makes me feel like my sleep schedule is on track again. I really want to live life again without feeling exhausted.

Ah, childhood. The days when I would get up at 7:00 AM on a weekend just to watch Digimon and Yu-gi-oh!. Now I get up at noon and don't even give a shit about cartoons anymore.

The noon thing is going to changed though. I have realized how much other stuff I could be doing in a matter of two hours.

-Lily

i hate how i want to go sleep but i can't because i don't feel like it. does that make sense?

but luckily summer school is over this Thursday, so i'll be free. i'll have 3 days of bliss and then i'll be on a plane to HK. except right now i'm not excited, i'm just really fucking worried that they'll lose my luggage or i'll miss my flight. or even worse...what if the plane crashes?!

and then i'm worried about jet lag because it took Rhee-soo two weeks to get used to it. damn, that's like half of my trip. i don't want to spend half of my trip feeling woozy and tired.

mmm. my dad bought a new digicam and gave it to me to take pics in HK. haha, i love taking pics. and call me a teenybopper, but i really hope i see someone famous, lol. just not Twins or Cookies though. *makes face* actually, i don't think i'd even recognize the Cookies members if they were right in front of my face, hahaha.

oh yeah, i had a major moment last Wednesday. that was when i became a TAKE fan, lol! it's kinda weird, because this is around the time when i became a Shinhwa fan. Nathan is so goddamn hot. SungJae and SeungHee have great voices. and i think DoWan has the best 'talking' voice ever. they're fucking awesome.

HARRY POTTER COMES OUT THIS WEEK. *pulls hair from excitement*

last day of school tomorrow. woooot.

and the beginning of summer school for me on the 20th. joy. but before that i have Session Two on the 14th. i think. it has probably changed since Kimmy and I switched to Jungle Survival. then i will most likely immediately go to Hong Kong for about a month. 3 weeks. gah. and i'll have that AP assignment to do. i want to do a lot of volunteer work as well.

it feels so weird to actually have stuff to do this summer.

oh god...i forgot about the pulling of my wisdom teeth this week.

0____________________0

my god, i've really been neglecting my LJ. my Xanga is already enough work. bah.

i got DDR today. i don't need to say anymore about that though. that games just kicks all asses. (too bad i got a shitty dance pad though. i'm going to return it later.)

more words to look up in the dictionary:

-maudlin
-fortuitous (although i have an inkling of what that might mean.)
-conundrum
-cavalierly
-il duce

edit: i realize that i can use these in my everyday vocabulary. sweeeeetness.

you know, sometimes i think i'm truly weird. i'll be wondering about the most stupid things, and i can't even say any of them to my friends, otherwise they'll just scoff and think i'm dumb. or high. o.0 i seriously don't think that anyone in this world understands me or thinks the way i do. which i guess is a good thing. but sometimes i feel really odd, like the way i act isn't even how i want to act. like a cover-up or something. and i don't even mean to do it. like when i laugh at peoples' comments or jokes, i feel like i'm being forced to laugh. i know i have to laugh, otherwise i come off as an unfriendly introverted loser. i'm working on that though. if i had my way, i really don't think i'd laugh or smile all that often. i was thinking about that today after Laura told me i looked grim in the pictures. haha...i'm not sure why i always look like that in most of the pictures i'm in. is it the way i really feel inside?? and if it is, i don't even know what the hell is causing it. i wish i knew where my life was going. i wish i had someone to look up to. i wish someone could tell me what i want to do with my life.

good god, i sound even more lost now. >.<

alright, i'm done.

but before i explain why i'm so screwed, i just wanted to say another year has come and gone like ::snaps::

i mean, February is coming up already. which shall be my doom because that's when my piano recital and Festival is. (i think i've overused the word 'doom'...i use it to describe Yearbook, exams, and pretty much anything unfortunate that happens to me.) and school will be over soon. which i'm kinda happy and not happy about. once it's over i can do whatever i want, but i'm supposed to go to HK and the rest of China this year.

i don't feel like walking the Great Wall. (yes, i called it 'China Wall' once. how smart am i? i probably just disgraced all the Chinese.) i don't think i'll ever feel like walking the Great Wall. although my mother says it won't be as bad since they installed escalators in? o.0 are they allowed to do such things with an ancient structure?

and now i hear that Shinhwa is most definitely not going to perform in HK...::sobs:: they're the reason why i wanted to go to HK so badly in the first place. and if they do go and i miss them by like a year or month, i'll kill myself.

i am screwed, because i'm going to be murdered by my mother when she comes home. i wouldn't be surprised if she grounds me and snatches the computer away from me. [godammit, why is it so hot in this room? ::shuts off air vent::]

again, it doesn't feel like it. Christmas just isn't the same anymore. i was just talking to Megan about it this morning. when you're younger it's exciting, because it means you'll prolly be getting the latest Barbie or action figure, or the sweetest doll house ever or an awesome remote control car.

now?

psh. those things don't exact appeal anymore. i mean, for me...all i want are just a few CDs and some clothes. i really wanted DDR, but i higly doubt i'm going to receive that.

yeah...so nope, no jittery feelings at all.

yeah, that goat oddly reminds me of a hippie.

it doesn't even feel like Christmas is coming. -_- i think i'm become quite a pessimist over the years...the thought of all the yummy food and presents don't even excite me anymore.

it snowed about six inches today...Laura, you're lucky you're in Pennsylvania right now. do they get much snow there?

i wanted to put a stop to all that snow and save it for the morning when we get back to school. :sigh: sadly, things don't work that way.

damn, ever since i got that x-tracker thing, i've been seeing people who i never thought knew i exitsed read my Xanga quite often. it's surprising yet pleasing. now if only they'd leave comments! but half of them don't even know me that well, so i geuss it only makes sense that they don't choose to leave comments.

anyway, for Kim's party tonight. i think i'll end up bringing mini candy canes and popcorn. call me immature, but i'm really glad that it's only just us girls tonight. half of the guys that Kim's friends with i don't know...so it would've been very awkward.

OMG...it turns out for Xanga, there's this invisible tracker thing...ANYONE CAN SEE WHO'S BEEN TO THEIR XANGA.

what if 'the hot one' has one on his site?! he'll know i visit there about 10 times a day!

oh dear god, please tell me he does NOT have one.

i've become quite partial to Snow Patrol. i may even like them more than Phantom Planet!

anyway...the 'hot one' sure has good taste in music...i like all the songs he puts on his Xanga a lot except for the rap ones. ugh. those suck. wow, i sure mention him a lot in here, don't i?

no, i don't like him. i've focused my interests elsewhere. :sigh: but it's another one of those 'crushing from afar' things. that's prolly how it'll always be with me.

i'm so damn tired right now. i got up at 4:00 AM just to go shopping today. it was so worth it.

LMAO. i am reading this hilarious person's LJ right now. someone who made the odd choice of converting from a Xanga to an LJ. not a bad choice if you want more privacy.

i'll edit this entry later. as of now, i must go watch Gilmore Girls.